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Grandparents... (Dear Abby column)

Fern Modena

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Something not mentioned in the Dear Abby column, but something I loved to do with the Grands when they were younger.

I bought a box of washable markers and kept them just for the Grands visits. I'd let them color however they wanted on my (clear) shower door. When they were really young, we'd remove their shirts before they colored so they wouldn't get their clothes dirty (and then they colored their bellies, too!). They loved the coloring, which was something they only did at "Nonno and Nonnas." As they got older, they still wanted to color on the shower door, although it became more artistic, and more filled with hearts and flowers and sweet notes to us.

Fern
 

pjrose

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Something not mentioned in the Dear Abby column, but something I loved to do with the Grands when they were younger.

I bought a box of washable markers and kept them just for the Grands visits. I'd let them color however they wanted on my (clear) shower door. When they were really young, we'd remove their shirts before they colored so they wouldn't get their clothes dirty (and then they colored their bellies, too!). They loved the coloring, which was something they only did at "Nonno and Nonnas." As they got older, they still wanted to color on the shower door, although it became more artistic, and more filled with hearts and flowers and sweet notes to us.

Fern

What fun! Great idea :)
 

artringwald

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DRI: The Point at Poipu, 3 deeded weeks, 1 of which is in The Club.
My daughter's husband was killed in an accident 8 years ago, so I've been doing my best to do the kinds of things a fun dad would do: movies, ball games, biking, tennis, shopping, concerts, and math homework (my favorite). It's fun and I love it, but it does wear me out.
 

Patri

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These are great ideas, and keep posting if you have more.
Just yesterday I decided I wanted to give my 2-year-old granddaughter an experience instead of a toy for Christmas. DIL said she was cleaning out closets, and would be getting rid of toys GD didn't use any more. Said she would be getting many for Christmas.

I don't want to be disposable, so will think of things to do for a day with her. Will take time off work for this. Hopefully do in January.
 

SOS8260456

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I think spending time is wonderful. Sadly, my childrens grandparents were too busy to find the time to spend quality time or even to attend events like school concerts and sporting events. They wonder why they are now so disconnected from their older grandchildren, even though I would try to do what I could to encourage more interaction. I had wonderful experiences with my grandparents and was always sad that the same could not be said for my own children's experiences. I know spending time with grandchildren, especially the younger ones can be exhausting, so kudos to those that are able to do so. And for those who are unable to do a lot of physical things, there are still ways to stay connected. Doesn't have to be much, just consistent and on a regular basis even if just monthly.

I hope that if I am ever lucky enough to become a grandparent, that I will have learned from other's ways to make it special because I still have wonderful memories of the time spent with my grandparents and even my one grandmother's sisters because my grandmother died at an early age and her many sisters stepped in to "mother" her grandchildren and make sure they were included in everything.
 

PamMo

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Our grandchildren (2-years old to 8) live on both coasts, and we live in the Midwest, so we really treasure our limited time together. We plan at least one "grand" vacation with all of our family every year (using our timeshares), and we've been lucky enough to host "Gramp Camp" with each of our grandkids. That's when a grandchild comes out to spend one-on-one (or two-on-one :D) time with us, and we get to do whatever we like for a couple of weeks. We check out all the area parks, go to the zoo, watch trains up close in the rail yard, do chores, have late night story telling, plan adventures - it's all good. Being able to goof off with the kids and build very special memories together gives us more joy than I can express. I highly recommend having at least some one-on-one time with your grandchildren!
 

Fern Modena

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Some other things the grands liked to do include baking cookies with me. We'd go and feed the ducks at a local pond (buying day old bread for this). We'd go to a smaller airport and watch planes take off. Little kids love this. during summer we used to take them to walk in/near a fountain. Today they have Splash Pads at some parks, and the younger kids like this better than a wading pool.

At home, I always wanted them to drink milk instead of soda pop, because I think it is better for them. So I had hot chocolate powder, milk, nonfat dry milk, and ice, and mixed this in a blender to make a chocolate milkshake. Even as an adult Johnny has asked for this when he visits. He thinks it is a magical thing I keep at hand :)

I just thought of something else. I have some of those small, hand held Kaleidoscopic toys that are just an eye viewer and beveled glass on the other end, where kids can look at all sorts of things and examine them. As children reach five or so, they enjoy real kaleidoscopes.

All of these things cost more time than money, and that's what the Grandkids remember most, the time you spend with them.

Fern
 
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Icc5

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Only one Granddaughter

We only have the 7yr old and she goes on several vacations a year with us. Does lots of things with grandma including baking and crafts and games now and then.
The difference here for the past 15 months is my granddaughter along with her parents are living with us until they can afford a place. We're in Silicon Valley so them affording a place seems to only be a dream.
Bart
 

Dori

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We spend a lot of time with our 3 and 5 year old grandchildren. Thankfully, they live close by. We try to pick them up once a week during their school lunch hour and make grilled cheese sandwiches for lunch. they love the change from the daily lunches they take to school.
We sometimes pick them up after school and they stay for supper, or on a Friday, they will do supper and a sleepover. Frequently, we do one at a time, so we can devote all our attention to just one.

Last summer, we babysat for July and August, so we had a wonderful time with them, riding bikes, swimming doing crafts, sidewalk chalk, reading, playing board games and so much more. We did the Ripley's Aquarium, and a day downtown

In July, we took them to a Timeshare for a week, just north of Toronto (about a 1 1/2 hour drive). We had a great time, and Mommy and Daddy were able to join us on the weekend. We swam twice a day, went to the beach, the zoo, out for dinner, lots of time at the playground.

Our 3rd grandbaby, 18 months old, lives in South Korea. We just got back in September from a 2 week visit to see her, our dear son and daughter-in-law. We are so excited that they are coming to stay for a few weeks over Christmas, so we will have the whole family together.

Being a grandparent is the very best!!:cheer:

Dori
 
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vacationhopeful

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Oh, dang ... I took my 4 year old nephew to work for a week for many summers. I repair rental properties. He had to get up at 6AM, out the door by 6:45AM, lunch at 11AM and off the job site by 3PM - only to do more Home Depot runs & dealing with my clients. Work in the home garden (about an acre). Then dinner.

Surprise! The boy would either "ask to go to bed early" or be happy when I said, "ready for bed?" ... never was up or awake after 8PM.

For a week each summer from age 4 thru age 10 ....

Oh, this is the kid the rest of the family just dreads when he is around ... maybe because for his church "first something" he refused to get his picture taken and started to strip out in front of the church. Was dragged home and then did stripped out of his clothes (down to his shorts) before the "party"/luncheon began ... until I asked him "why?" He did not want his picture taken. I said, if he allowed the relatives take all the pictures until they were happy, I would give him my digital camera and he could spend the afternoon taking their pictures. He got dressed back into his church clothes and after everyone got ALL the pictures they wanted, I gave him my camera. He took pictures the rest of the day. And he was a very pleasant child - smiling nicely.

His parents brought him an identical camera a couple of months later for his birthday ... with a big memory card and he had not broken or lost his camera.
 
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Fern Modena

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I also always had crayons, pictures to color, and follow the dots pages. All of that was courtesy of various websites. You can find pictures on almost any subject they like, and they love to choose subjects to color.

Fern
 

brigechols

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My kids love to play bingo and dominoes with one grandma. The other grandma takes them to Studio Movie Grilll to watch animated movies while munching on buttered popcorn. :D
 

pjrose

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I didn't have any grandparents. There were assorted elderly aunts whom I met a few times, but everyone was scattered around the country. My only memory is that they would send very practical pjs for christmas. Sad now that I look back, but I didn't know any different so I guess it was ok.

Sadder still is that my own kids didn't really have grands growing up. My parents died long before we had kids, and DH's father/stepmother have little interest in kids. Though they live only a 4 hour drive or shorter train ride away, they're always "too busy" and when we could arrange a visit to them once or twice a year it seemed that the kids were an inconvenience, especially with "all that stuff". (Porta crib, high chair, stroller, toys, diaper bag... ). They would generally arrange a zoo trip or musical, but usually it was adult activities, such as dinners with lots of adult guests, or art museums.

Now we have two grand babies whom the great grands have never even met. There has been no communication with the great grand stepmother (not so with her own baby grandson on the other side of the country). 95 y/o great grandfather says he would like to visit, but it's never convenient for him, and for all of us to visit them would be a huge imposition.

Sooooooo....knowing all of that, we see our grands at least weekly. DH and the 18 month old (the one who was born a 2 lb preemie ) have an amazing connection. I wish it weren't such a cliche, but the two really light up when they see each other. They play, DH reads, they "play" the piano together, etc. the younger one doesn't do much yet, and is just starting to smile and connect. I look forward to walks around the lake to feed the ducks and trips to playgrounds, Disney on ice, etc. we did try a few musicals, but older grandson was so excited he kept squealing with delight, and we had to go out to the lobby. But we will try again when they're a little older!
 
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bluehende

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We are currently spending a week babysitting our dear 18 month old grandchild. We live 6 hrs away so this time is very precious. In today's hectic everyday life parents are too busy. The most beautiful thing is just spending time with 100% attention. We are lucky to have that luxury. Yesterday was spent rough housing, reading books, going to the playground, and a lot of time being pushed around in an empty box. Oh and playing with the big bin of Halloween candy. She ate like a horse and slept like a log. She was not the only one.
 

radmoo

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You are all blessed. We have 2 beautiful grands on left coast but crazy parents, my son and his wife won't give us alone time. The parents are always underfoot and this is very stressful. I should mention that I taught preschool for 16 years. Go figure!
 

amycurl

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We have a rule that grandparents can do whatever they want; makes life less stressful all around (we did feel they did a pretty good job with us, after all.) it seems this policy has really encouraged grandparent involvement. ;) when my mother retired, she started taking my daughter for 4-6 weeks each summer (she lives in Maine,) and, the next year, she bought a place down here where she spends the winter and provides after school care. :) my in-laws live 5 hours away--they usually don't go for more than two or three months without seeing her, and have taken her for weekends/ weeks on their own. Lucky both sets have relative freedom and security, and my daughter is the only on my side, and the closest on my husbands (she had five years as an only on both.)


Sent from my iPad using Tapatalk
 

glypnirsgirl

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Really appreciate the article and other posts

I am new to being a grandparent. My grand baby was born 7 weeks premature --- was taken due to gestational restriction --- she had not grown any in the two weeks prior to her birth. Small, at 3 lbs 2 ozs, but not nearly as small as PJ's grandbaby. Grandbaby is now 5 months old.

She is a 3 hour plane ride away.

I spent the first month of her life with her parents. I spent a substantial amount of time at the hospital and driving her mom back and forth to be with her. I am fortunate that my DIL is an excellent, stay-at-home, mom.

My son is an only child, his wife is an only child. Jordan has no cousins on my side of the family. He has two cousins on his dad's side --- but he isn't close to them because they are much better off financially than we are --- they just travel in different circles and have very little in common.

Since leaving her a month after her birth, I have been to see her three times. I try to make at least 4 days at a time. Jordan was really smart and took his family leave after the baby was able to travel and they spent the three week leave here in Texas instead of staying without family up in Virginia.

I had no idea that I could love a baby so much. Today, while I was talking to my DIL on the phone, grand baby started screeching. It is her newest delight. Even though she is horribly loud, it was a joy for me to be able to hear her.

elaine
 
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