Hotels make for good in-laws?

[BarbmC]

My daughter and her husband live about an hour and 45 minutes away from me. I love to visit and see my 2 year old grandson, and often baby sit for them. I always stay in a hotel, as I believe in healthy boundaries and do not want my son in law (who has a crappy relationship with his own parents) to ever resent my being there. There is a Fairfield Inn, a Residence Inn and a full service Marriott all within 10 minutes of them. There are times when I do the drive both ways in the same day, but if its a late night, I'll stay over. I have a friend who thinks I am nuts, that I should just stay with them. I say I'll make it easier for my daughter and be a good mother in law. Anyone else have similar experience?

 

[Luanne]

Although my dh is the most generous person in the world and will offer up our house for guests when we go to visit anyone, family or friends, he prefers to stay in a hotel. If it's just me and I'm visiting my sister I will always stay with her.

 

[silentg]

We used to stay with my parents and they stayed with us. Lots of times they would stay with the kids while DH and I would go away for a weekend.
Sometimes, my Dad would get a bit too comfortable and take control of tv, mealtimes, and in general become overbearing.DH has a lot of patience and my dad and husband got along, my husband would let him have his way, this bothered me more than it did my husband.
My mother was never any trouble, we took her on vacations after Dad passed.
MIL didn’t like to travel and never visited us in Florida. We stayed with her only a very few times, she rarely babysat.
Now parents and in-laws have past, and when we visit siblings we stay at hotels, or timeshares.
Kids are grown and on their own. It makes much nicer visits in hotels.
Sorry to ramble, I think the way you are helping and staying in a hotel is a great idea.
Silentg

 

[JohnPaul]

We ran a very small bed and breakfast in Seattle for about 10 years in the Mt Baker neighborhood.

We became the parent and grandparents specialists for the neighborhood. It seemed to be good for everyone all around to let the parents/grandparents get away to their own space.

 

[b2bailey]

As long as it is not a financial burden for you, I can understand the hotel. However, as your grandson gets a bit older, be prepared for him to ask why you don't stay with them. Just recently, my 7 year old grandson looked me straight in the eye and asked "but why do you have to leave?" -- and this after I had slept at their house for several nights.

 

[bluehende]

We stay most of the time with the kids and grandkids. Cannot replace when the grandkids climb into your bed to snuggle. Cann't do that at a hotel.

 

[Tank]

We travel a couple times a month 2 hours to babysit our 2 yr old, they both work the mother part time. We go the night before to avoid Columbus rush hour , and assure safe arrival so they can go to work. We stay the night. Cost about $30 in gas wouldn't do it if I didn't feel welcome to stay we are doing them a favor. When we visit on a Sunday it's a 1 day trip.
Seeing how childcare was around $14 grand a year.
We work hard at maintaining a good relationship so as to always be welcome.
We don't tell them what to do , and if he wants advice ask!

Not that old yet but age might be a factor some day.
Already planning on NOT getting another dog, our westy is 8 years old, worry about getting home to let her out. I don't believe in taking our dog to Someone else's house.
Hotel would cost $100 plus a night, now when we had a wedding in his town we did get a hotel for the weekend.

Dave

 

[presley]

I always prefer having my own space. That said, when my mom was alive, she was welcome to stay overnight anytime that she wanted to.

 

[AnnaS]

If it does not bother you financially, why not.

There are not many people that I can stay overnight with. A sister, son, daughter, mother and maybe a very, very close aunt (which we do in Toronto). Anyone else, we will book a room. Hubby and I like our privacy and space.

My daughter is getting married and moving two hours away. She can come and stay overnight anytime she wants. Once she gets a job where she will be, I am sure time will be limited. Hubby and I have done the same day drive many times getting the house ready. Once she moves in, we will most likely stay sometimes overnight and make the drive home early in the morning - especially in the winter when it gets dark at 4:30.

We don't ever want to overstay our welcome. He stays here all the time when he visits. If we have a healthy relationship, I don't a reason for us to stay in a hotel.